I'm sure everyone has had the experience of being embarrassed by something their child said. When my oldest son was about three we ran into an older lady in the mall who was wearing a LOT of bright red lipstick and rouge. She spoke to my son and said something like "You are so cute. You look so handsome". And he promptly yelled out ,"And you look like a clown!". This would be the same son, who a few years later, was at a funeral home for the wake of a relative and told the grieving widow ,"I hate coming here. I just can't stand dead bodies". What do you say at that point?? (Take heart if your kids are still little...the teenage years are coming and you can really pay them back for any embarrassment they may have caused you!)
I've heard stories from friends who had said something negative about a relative or neighbor in front of their child and the child later then told the person "My mama said..." and repeated the whole thing that their parent had said about the person. We've all heard stories about a child who learned a curse word or something inappropriate from an adult and then repeated it at a time or in a situation that really embarrassed the parent.
As parents, we've all made mistakes in things we have said. Hopefully, we have all learned that we have to be careful about what we say in front of our children and that we shouldn't say anything inappropriate whether our children are listening or not. As adults, we know whats appropriate and whats not. We know what our children should NOT say...but what are we teaching them about what they SHOULD say?
Are you teaching your child to speak the Word of God over their life?
Deuteronomy 6:6-9 says "these commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them upon your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your house and on your gates".
Have you ever had your child correct you using your own words? When my kids were little, they would ask me where a certain toy was and expect me to find it. I would say "I did not play with your toy. You should have put it where you could find it. You need to go look it yourself." Well guess what happened one day when I asked one of them to help me find my lost car keys. I was quickly told by my child, "I did not drive your car. You should have put your keys where you could find them. You need to look them yourself." OUCH! Convicted by my own words.
As my children are growing up, I am trying to teach them the Biblical principle of "calling things that are not as though they were". That means that you should speak positively about what you want to see happen, even if circumstances look differently. We are to talk as if the change that we want to see happen has already happened. Recently, I was scolding my youngest child for something he had done and telling him all the bad things that could happen as a result of his misbehavior. He said "Wait a minute, Mama, you're supposed to talk about what you WANT to see happen. You're not supposed to talk about all the bad things that could happen." OUCH! Busted again!
Even though our kids can embarrass us with their words and sometimes convict us with our own words, there are times when they can make us so proud with their words. During a previous school year, my youngest son came home from school crying one day. He was very upset over the way that he interpreted something his teacher had said. Apparently my son and other students were goofing off or misbehaving while reviewing for the end of grade test. The teacher warned them that if they did not pay attention, they would not do well on the test and if they did not pass, they would have to repeat their grade. Well, in my son's eyes, his teacher had just told him he was failing his end of grade test and was repeating his grade. My oldest son and I were listening to my youngest son tell his story amid his sobs. I was about to explain to my son what I thought the teacher meant, when my oldest son boldly spoke up and said "Oh no. Absolutely not. We DO NOT receive that. You are NOT going to fail your end of grade test. You are going to pass that test and you are going to pass your grade in the name of Jesus!" I was so proud of my oldest son. I had been teaching my children that they do not have to receive curses or negative words that are spoken over them. I kept thinking, "He really is getting it. He really is hearing what I am trying to teach him". In spite of all the mistakes I have made, he did learn something GOOD that I had said !
What are your children hearing you say?
The Bible says that the power of life and death is in our own tongue. We can speak life or blessings over a person or a situation or we can choose to speak death or curses over a person or situation. The power is in our own words. Phillippians 4:8 tells us that we are to think about things that are "true, honest, just, pure, lovely, of good report, of virtue or of praise". We are supposed to think of the good in a situation and talk about that and not the negative. Your Mama was actually being Biblical when she told you if you couldn't say anything nice not to say anything at all!
Learn to speak positively over your life and your family. Have you ever quoted scripture prayers over your children or over a certain situation in your life in which you needed prayer? There is POWER in speaking the Word of God. Isaiah 55 says that God's word will not return to him empty, but will accomplish what he desires and achieve the purpose for which He sent it. Claim God's promises for yourself and your family daily. If you're not sure how to do that, you can google scripture prayers or buy a book of Bible scripture promises to help you get started.
Speak life and not death over your personal situations ..and get in the habit of speaking the promises of God over yourself and your family today.
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