My advice for you today is very wise...good, sound, Christian advice. Get out a pen and pencil. You will want to write this down. This is good stuff. Ready? Okay. My advice is....WHEN SOMEONE HURTS YOUR FEELINGS, GET REVENGE!
So, you are thinking, "Umm, that's not very Christian" or "I don't know what kind of Bible you are reading". Some of you may be thinking "That's exactly right, don't get mad, get even!" So, "What's going on?" you ask? "Who made you mad, Leigh-Ann?" Let me explain.
Don't worry. I'm still Christian. Still happy. No one made me mad. I preached two sermons on Sunday, as a matter of fact. All is well. Actually, I was talking with a fellow blogger at church this weekend who reminded me that it had been a long time since I posted a blog. I made the usual excuses, "Yes, I know. I've got to get back to it. I will soon. I've been busy, etc." I really hadn't given any more thought to blogging in the three days since, until God brought something to my attention. I didn't have a word of encouragement or advice to share, until last night. Then, my blogging itch returned. I actually had some words of wisdom pop into this 'ole brain of mine!
I had a revelation. There are people that do not like you. There are people that do not like me. (At this point, you may be thinking, "That's not exactly a revelation. I already knew that!" Just stay with me, I'm getting to the point.) There are people in your life that will hurt your feelings, whether intentionally or unintentionally. Unfortunately, there may be one or two people in your life that have made up their mind that they do not want to get along with you. Don't take it personally. You never know what's going on with the other person. Hurting people hurt people. Also, you don't know what kind of lies Satan is feeding them about YOU.
I realized last night that there are people that I just can't have a conversation with. Any conversation that I attempt to have with them ends with them getting angry, raising their voice and usually involves the use of curse words towards me. The revelation that I had is this. "I cannot change how they feel about me. I cannot control how they talk to me...but what I do have control over, what I can change....is how I RESPOND!" I can quietly and courteously end the conversation and move on...OR I can keep trying to explain my point and get angry and frustrated and act in an un-Christian manner myself. I can hang up the phone and then carry on with my day as planned OR I can let those words keep me angry, sad, hurt, frustrated, etc. for the rest of my day. After hanging up the phone, I can say a prayer for the person OR I can call two or three friends and tell them every word they said and have a pity party about how badly I was treated. [Because of course, our buddies will take our side, right? When we're mad, we call folks we know will agree with us!] (SMILE)
The revelation that I had is that it is MY CHOICE! I actually have a choice in this situation. Even though I can't make them like me... Even though I can't stop them from having a harsh tone or using harsh words..I actually have plenty of choices. I can control how I let it affect me, I can control how long the conversation lasts, I can control how long I listen to those words in my head after the conversation is over, and I can control how I respond. You have those same choices. You might not be able to change the way some people feel about you or what they say to you or about you...but you choose how you respond and how you let it affect you! Shake it off! Just like water off a duck's back!
Several months ago, I had another revelation. That's where the revenge part comes in. The Bible says that we reap what we sow. (Galations 6:7). The Bible also says that our words have power. (Proverbs 18:21). Our words can bring healing or death to a situation. The Bible also says that we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, (people), but that our struggle is against evil forces. (Ephesians 6:12). Now, when someone has said or done something unkind towards you, the temptation is to retaliate, or get revenge. You might argue back or tell lots of people about the terrible thing that was done to you, so that they will feel sorry for you. You want people to dislike the other person that hurt you. The problem is that the person that hurt you is a child of God, made in the image of God, too. Even if they are an unbeliever, they are still God's workmanship. When you say something negative about them, your words are planting seeds. Unfortunately, you will reap the harvest of those negative words, and not the other person! According to Ephesians 6:12, you are upset with the wrong person. Its Satan that you should be angry with, not the other person! When Jesus was on the cross, he prayed for the people crucifying him! He prayed "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing!" We should not retaliate against people. The Bible says that vengeance, (or revenge), belongs to the Lord! Do not seek revenge against people.
Though I have been guilty in the past of talking too much about my hurt and letting hurtful words have too much power over me...I'm working on my new strategy. I don't seek revenge against people. I get revenge against the source of the problem! Now, whenever I hear something negative or hurtful that has been said about me, I plant a seed of kindness or do a good deed that will be an attack against the devil's plans. The devil wants me to be mad, angry, hurt, frustrated, discouraged, defeated, downcast, tired, insecure, inferior....(You get the idea). John 10:10 says that the devil has come to kill, steal, and destroy, but God has come that we might have an abundant life! I was recently praying to God about a situation and asking Him what he wanted me to do. Do you know the answer I received? "Enjoy your life!" That was the answer. Nothing profound. I was expecting something grander, bigger, loftier. Nope. Just "Enjoy your life!" So, while God works on the issue, I'm having fun!.
Start planting some good seeds that will give you the kind of harvest that you want. I promise, if you choose to take revenge against Satan's attacks by planting good seeds, you will start having fun with it and people will be blessed. If someone is hurtful to you, send them a gift. Bake them a cake. If that's not possible, bake a cake for a sick person or co-worker going through a difficult time. Put an extra $5 or $10 in the offering plate at church above your normal giving. Sow it as a seed and ask God to help you have forgiveness towards the person that hurt you. Start praying for God to bless that person. You won't believe what happens. Sow good seeds towards the hurt you experienced and expect blessings.
Months ago, someone said something unkind about my cooking and whether or not I know how to cook. They purposely meant it to be unkind. At first, I was angry and then hurt....Did I call them and set them straight? No. And they won't read this either. They'll never know that I know what they said. Guess what I did? I signed up to be in charge of my church's ministry to feed the homeless at the rescue mission. I'm now cooking for lots of people! All sorts of people from my church are volunteering to help. The homeless are being blessed and the volunteers are being blessed. I've talked to the Pastor about expanding the ministry in the future because we have more volunteers and more food than we do homeless people! New people have joined the church that have experience running a whole food pantry to feed a much bigger group of people than we are currently feeding. This ministry has potential to grow and bless MORE people. How cool is that?
Plant a seed, give an offering, do SOMETHING to bless someone today. Each time you are slighted, hurt, accused, mistreated....plant another seed, do another good deed, pray another prayer of blessing over the person.
Let your hurt be used for good! Let your hurt be used for God!
Genesis 50:20
You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many.
Romans 8:28 And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Have You Stirred Up a Nest of Trouble?
Recently, my son was riding four wheelers at my sister's house and got involved in an accident. He fell off the four wheeler and landed in a bed of fire ants. Unfortunately, he received several fire ant bites. (Approximately 60 - 75 bites). My sister quickly put him in the shower and began to research various remedies on the internet. (One suggestion was to apply worchestire sauce!) In the course of her research, she read that fire ants quickly swarm a person, but do not bite at first. They wait until the person is covered with a swarm of fire ants, and then they send "the signal". At that moment, they begin their attack and start biting all at once. They are sneaky! You see, if the first fire ant that reached you bit you, you would immediately feel it and swipe that fire ant away. You would look down and see all of the fire ants that were about to swarm you and you would get away from them. So the fire ant's instinct is to wait until you are sufficiently covered with a swarm of fire ants and then to go into attack mode. With so many fire ants attacking you at one time, you are helpless and unable to beat them all off at once. While you are brushing them off one area, the fire ant's buddies are eating you alive in another area. Luckily, my son's cousin and friend came to his rescue and began helping him knock the fire ants off. They each received bites on their hands and arms as a result of their good deed.
So lets learn a lesson and take a spiritual application from this. If you walk past a bed of fire ants and you don't kick the nest mound or accidentally disturb it, you're probably pretty safe. If you just keep on walking and they don't bother you and you don't bother them, all is well. However, when you start disturbing their territory, they are going to get angry. If you accidentally step into a mound of fire ants and get them all stirred up, you are going to have trouble! A fire ant bite is extremely painful and then continues to itch mercilessly for days afterward. In addition to that, we've already learned that fire ants are sneaky and love to swarm a man when he's down. Imagine that fire ants are demonic forces. (If you've ever been bitten by one, that's not much of a stretch.)
The Bible says that we don't wrestle against people, we wrestle against wicked spiritual forces, or demonic forces. That means that people are not our problem. Even though it seems that people cause our problems, it is actually the wicked spiritual forces in our world that make people act the way they do. So, if we imagine that fire ants are like these demonic forces...When we are going about our daily lives and busy in the day-to day duties of working, paying bills, completing our chores, etc. we are not disturbing the wicked spiritual forces in our world. However, when we start making positive changes and growing spiritually, we start disturbing those demonic forces. When you commit your life to Christ or start growing in Christ, you are disturbing the kingdom of darkness. When you start increasing your prayer time, fasting, or starting a new ministry, you are disturbing the "fire ant nest" of spiritual wickedness. When you were not really making a difference, the spiritual forces of wickedness left you alone. When you started growing in Christ or making a difference in the Kingdom of God, you kicked open that nest of demonic fire ants...and they swarmed you.
Start noticing that as soon as you do something good for God or start a new ministry or spiritual discipline, trouble will appear in your life. When my Pastor and his wife began their journey to plant a new church, they disturbed the kingdom of darkness, and began to get swarmed. Difficult events such as job loss and a house fire begin invading their life. Now, in hindsight, approximately three years later, we see that they are Pastoring a successful church plant that is making a difference in the community. The first time I ever embarked upon a Daniel fast, my whole life fell apart. Now, in hindsight, I see that I have received many blessings and grown so much since that time. The first time I ever spoke in a Sunday service at church, I was scheduled to speak in a Sunday evening service. I selected "Spiritual Warfare" as my topic. (What was I thinking???) Everything that could go wrong that afternoon and up until the time of the service, did go wrong. Finally, I just started laughing at the stuff that went wrong.
I've learned that if I am going to speak at my church or at another church, I will usually have something go wrong in my personal life or at work that week or in some way have something upsetting happen on the day that I am supposed to speak. Once, when I was supposed to speak on a Sunday morning, I was pleasantly surprised as I got dressed to go speak, when I realized that I hadn't really had anything negative happen that week. I thought that was strange, but just shrugged it off. In a few minutes, my Dad called and asked me why I hadn't brought my kids to his house to stay with him while I went to speak. He was going to carry them to our church while I spoke at a different church. I said, "Well, I probably won't take them over until about 9:45 am." He said "It is 9:45!" I had forgotten that was the weekend to spring forward into daylight savings time and I was an hour behind! Thankfully, I did make it on time, but not without a struggle!
If you are increasing your prayer time or trying to start a new spiritual discipline or in some way seeking God like never before...don't be surprised when trouble comes knocking at your door. Most importantly, don't let trouble fool you into thinking that you made the wrong choice and you need to give up. When trouble comes, just say to yourself, "Hmmm...I must be on the right track!" Don't get discouraged, God can help you overcome any trouble that comes against you.
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
Peter said, "Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed."
When trouble comes, tell your trouble what God says about you. "No weapon formed against me shall prosper", or "Greater is He that is within me than He that is within the world".
God's glory is going to be revealed in the midst of your trouble! Stay the course...don't give up.
Recently, my son was riding four wheelers at my sister's house and got involved in an accident. He fell off the four wheeler and landed in a bed of fire ants. Unfortunately, he received several fire ant bites. (Approximately 60 - 75 bites). My sister quickly put him in the shower and began to research various remedies on the internet. (One suggestion was to apply worchestire sauce!) In the course of her research, she read that fire ants quickly swarm a person, but do not bite at first. They wait until the person is covered with a swarm of fire ants, and then they send "the signal". At that moment, they begin their attack and start biting all at once. They are sneaky! You see, if the first fire ant that reached you bit you, you would immediately feel it and swipe that fire ant away. You would look down and see all of the fire ants that were about to swarm you and you would get away from them. So the fire ant's instinct is to wait until you are sufficiently covered with a swarm of fire ants and then to go into attack mode. With so many fire ants attacking you at one time, you are helpless and unable to beat them all off at once. While you are brushing them off one area, the fire ant's buddies are eating you alive in another area. Luckily, my son's cousin and friend came to his rescue and began helping him knock the fire ants off. They each received bites on their hands and arms as a result of their good deed.
So lets learn a lesson and take a spiritual application from this. If you walk past a bed of fire ants and you don't kick the nest mound or accidentally disturb it, you're probably pretty safe. If you just keep on walking and they don't bother you and you don't bother them, all is well. However, when you start disturbing their territory, they are going to get angry. If you accidentally step into a mound of fire ants and get them all stirred up, you are going to have trouble! A fire ant bite is extremely painful and then continues to itch mercilessly for days afterward. In addition to that, we've already learned that fire ants are sneaky and love to swarm a man when he's down. Imagine that fire ants are demonic forces. (If you've ever been bitten by one, that's not much of a stretch.)
The Bible says that we don't wrestle against people, we wrestle against wicked spiritual forces, or demonic forces. That means that people are not our problem. Even though it seems that people cause our problems, it is actually the wicked spiritual forces in our world that make people act the way they do. So, if we imagine that fire ants are like these demonic forces...When we are going about our daily lives and busy in the day-to day duties of working, paying bills, completing our chores, etc. we are not disturbing the wicked spiritual forces in our world. However, when we start making positive changes and growing spiritually, we start disturbing those demonic forces. When you commit your life to Christ or start growing in Christ, you are disturbing the kingdom of darkness. When you start increasing your prayer time, fasting, or starting a new ministry, you are disturbing the "fire ant nest" of spiritual wickedness. When you were not really making a difference, the spiritual forces of wickedness left you alone. When you started growing in Christ or making a difference in the Kingdom of God, you kicked open that nest of demonic fire ants...and they swarmed you.
Start noticing that as soon as you do something good for God or start a new ministry or spiritual discipline, trouble will appear in your life. When my Pastor and his wife began their journey to plant a new church, they disturbed the kingdom of darkness, and began to get swarmed. Difficult events such as job loss and a house fire begin invading their life. Now, in hindsight, approximately three years later, we see that they are Pastoring a successful church plant that is making a difference in the community. The first time I ever embarked upon a Daniel fast, my whole life fell apart. Now, in hindsight, I see that I have received many blessings and grown so much since that time. The first time I ever spoke in a Sunday service at church, I was scheduled to speak in a Sunday evening service. I selected "Spiritual Warfare" as my topic. (What was I thinking???) Everything that could go wrong that afternoon and up until the time of the service, did go wrong. Finally, I just started laughing at the stuff that went wrong.
I've learned that if I am going to speak at my church or at another church, I will usually have something go wrong in my personal life or at work that week or in some way have something upsetting happen on the day that I am supposed to speak. Once, when I was supposed to speak on a Sunday morning, I was pleasantly surprised as I got dressed to go speak, when I realized that I hadn't really had anything negative happen that week. I thought that was strange, but just shrugged it off. In a few minutes, my Dad called and asked me why I hadn't brought my kids to his house to stay with him while I went to speak. He was going to carry them to our church while I spoke at a different church. I said, "Well, I probably won't take them over until about 9:45 am." He said "It is 9:45!" I had forgotten that was the weekend to spring forward into daylight savings time and I was an hour behind! Thankfully, I did make it on time, but not without a struggle!
If you are increasing your prayer time or trying to start a new spiritual discipline or in some way seeking God like never before...don't be surprised when trouble comes knocking at your door. Most importantly, don't let trouble fool you into thinking that you made the wrong choice and you need to give up. When trouble comes, just say to yourself, "Hmmm...I must be on the right track!" Don't get discouraged, God can help you overcome any trouble that comes against you.
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
Peter said, "Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed."
When trouble comes, tell your trouble what God says about you. "No weapon formed against me shall prosper", or "Greater is He that is within me than He that is within the world".
God's glory is going to be revealed in the midst of your trouble! Stay the course...don't give up.
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Lies, Pet Peeves, and Button Pushers!
Do you have any pet peeves? You know, the one thing that just drives you crazy and totally gets on your nerves? A pet peeve is something that really pushes your buttons. I've noticed that you can get a lot of insight into a person when you ask them about their pet peeves. Ask some friends or co-workers about their pet peeves and you will get some interesting answers. When I teach foster parent training classes, I have the participants go around the room and share the "pet peeves" they have that are related to parenting. Inevitably, someone in the group will always say that it really bothers them when a child lies to them.
One of my pet peeves is related to lying. As we know, lying is a sin. There is no such thing as "a little white lie". A lie is a lie and it's wrong. It's just that simple. However, there is one particular lie that drives me crazy and is my personal pet peeve. Let me explain. I understand why a child lies to avoid getting a spanking. I understand why someone says "the check is in the mail" even when its not. I understand why someone says "No, that dress looks fine. It doesn't make you look fat at all." I understand why a husband says to his wife "No, she's just a friend," or "I had to work late" when he's up to something he should not be involved with. I know why kids boast and brag or why mothers give fake alibis for adult children charged with a crime. I understand why a person lies in these situations. Its still wrong. Its still a sin, but I understand the motivation behind the lie. I don't judge people for their lies. A lie is a sin just like any other. Everyone has to answer for their own sins. Another person's lie is none of my business. My job is to pray for them. However, the one lie that is my business....the one lie that does concern me.... the one lie that is my personal pet peeve, is when someone lies to me about me.
Does that make sense? Do you understand what I'm trying to say? I mean when someone actually tells you a lie about you. If you think you've never had the experience of someone lying to you about you, let me explain. When someone says to you, "You think you are so..." they are lying to you about you. They have no idea what you think. When someone questions your motives and says "You did that because you wanted to..." they are lying to you about you. They don't know why you do the things you do. When someone tries to re-create history and says "that never happened," (even though you know it did), they are trying to lie to you about you. When someone says you are stupid, lazy, worthless, etc. they are lying to you about you. When someone says you are going to fail or in some way tries to predict failure or defeat for your future, they are trying to lie to you about you.
You do not have to listen to someone lie to you about you. Other people may try to lie to you about you and that is extremely frustrating. However, please understand that often the lies that other people try to get you to believe about yourself often come from the devil. The Bible says that our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against powers and principalities. In other words, its not the other person that is your problem. The problem usually is related to the way in which the devil is trying to use the other person's words to hurt you, push your buttons, or to keep you from doing something that God has called you to do. The devil is the father of lies and the author of confusion. Recognize the true source of your problem. Its very easy to let other people push your buttons and to put up with things that a child of God does not deserve and does not have to put up with. Respectfully stand up for yourself as a child of God!
One night last year, my Mom and Dad had come over to my house around 10:30 or 11:00 pm to help me fix something. Normally, they would never be at my house at that time of night. While they were there, I received a phone call from some one that was upset with me and did not agree with a decision I had made. Unfortunately, rather than "agreeing to disagree" or calmly sharing with me why they did not agree with me, the person verbally attacked me. To use a good old Johnston county term, I basically got "cussed out". The person who called me did not know that I had other adults in my home at the time of night. They would never had said the things they did, had they realized that they were talking so loudly that everything they said could be heard through the phone by my mother who was in the room with me. I tried to defend my choices and explain the situation, but the person I was talking to would not listen to me. My mother kept saying, "Just hang up the phone. You don't have to listen to that." After the phone call ended, my mother talked to me and said,"Look, you do not have to hear that. It's a telephone call. You can always hang up. There's no reason to sit there and let someone talk to you like that. It's crazy to put up with that".
You know what? She was so right. It is ridiculous to let someone verbally abuse you on the telephone when all you have to do is hang up. You don't have to put up with someone accusing you, calling you names or using foul language towards you in any situation. It's even CRAZIER to put up with it on a telephone that can so easily be hung up. Why would you listen to someone lie to you about you? The same principle applies to any lies that the devil uses to try to attack your mind. You don't have to listen to it. Don't put up with it. Don't let him accuse you, call you names, threaten you, make you worry, live in fear, feel inferior or unworthy. He's already been defeated. The God that lives inside you is greater than the devil that roams the world looking to start trouble with you! When the devil tries to lie to you about you, you don't have to accept it. Renounce it as a lie. Say what the word of God says about you. The Bible says that we can resist Satan lies and refute them with the truth of the Word of God. "Submit to God, resist the devil, and he will flee from you!"
(Check out a book called The Complete Promise Bible for Women. Its organized by topic. You can actually look up a particular issue and it lists the specific scripture references that you can quote over your own self or situation. )
Never underestimate the power of quoting the Word of God over yourself and your situation. The truth about you is what GOD says about you. If someone calls you stupid, you renounce and refute that lie with the Word of God. Example :"I have the mind of Christ. My mind is being renewed".
Now, you may have people say things about you that are hurtful, but are not technically a lie. For example, if someone calls you fat because they are trying to hurt your feelings...and you know that you are truly fat...well, that's hurtful and mean, but its not a lie at the time. However, you work to make it a lie. You talk to God about it and start calling things that are not as though they were. You say to yourself and to God, "I am not fat. I am healthy. I am strong. My body is a temple of the Holy Spirit. I am getting healthier every day. I am losing weight. I will lose ___ pounds." Then go out there and start working towards your goal. (I used the example of being called fat because that's my own issue. Apply your own issues that you personally need to work to overcome!)
The devil will allow people to push your buttons in hopes that he can keep you sad, lonely, defeated, and depressed. John 10:10 says that the devil is a thief that has come to kill, steal, and destroy. For years, every time someone called me fat, cursed at me, called me names or in some way hurt my feelings, the first thing that I would do to try to comfort myself was to go get something to eat! How ridiculous is that! It only made me fatter. Do you see how the devil set me up to fail and to destroy my own self? I cannot blame another person for my choices. My weight was something that had to be dealt with between me and God and by refusing the devil and not allowing him to push my buttons. With God's help, I want to be in a position one day that if someone calls me fat, I can honestly say, "That's a lie!"
Recently, I let someone's words upset me and make me cry. Later that evening, I went to church. Shortly after I sat down, the minister said in his sermon, "Why are you letting the devil push your buttons? You are letting him control you. The devil is defeated...but he's not stupid. If he can control you by pushing your buttons, he will!" That was a word for me...I needed to hear that. Don't let lies, hurtful words, ugly names, or accusations push your buttons or control you. (Remember how I allowed being called fat to keep me fat? Crazy, isn't it?)
The devil may have come to kill, steal, and destroy....but the second part of that verse says that Jesus came that you might have life...an ABUNDANT life! Start claiming the life that you want to have today. You know what? You've got a lot to be thankful for and you have a lot going for you. Don't believe any more lies. Don't ever let anyone else ever lie to you about you. Did you know that you can even be guilty of lying to you about you? Anytime you tell yourself you are dumb, worthless or that you never do anything right, you are lying to you about you! Start saying the truth about you. You're smart, you're kind, you love your family, you work hard, you have talents, God loves you, you know how to do lots of things, you like to help people, you have friends, you love your kids, you like to look nice, you like to make people happy... SEE? You're AWESOME..and that's the truth!
One of my pet peeves is related to lying. As we know, lying is a sin. There is no such thing as "a little white lie". A lie is a lie and it's wrong. It's just that simple. However, there is one particular lie that drives me crazy and is my personal pet peeve. Let me explain. I understand why a child lies to avoid getting a spanking. I understand why someone says "the check is in the mail" even when its not. I understand why someone says "No, that dress looks fine. It doesn't make you look fat at all." I understand why a husband says to his wife "No, she's just a friend," or "I had to work late" when he's up to something he should not be involved with. I know why kids boast and brag or why mothers give fake alibis for adult children charged with a crime. I understand why a person lies in these situations. Its still wrong. Its still a sin, but I understand the motivation behind the lie. I don't judge people for their lies. A lie is a sin just like any other. Everyone has to answer for their own sins. Another person's lie is none of my business. My job is to pray for them. However, the one lie that is my business....the one lie that does concern me.... the one lie that is my personal pet peeve, is when someone lies to me about me.
Does that make sense? Do you understand what I'm trying to say? I mean when someone actually tells you a lie about you. If you think you've never had the experience of someone lying to you about you, let me explain. When someone says to you, "You think you are so..." they are lying to you about you. They have no idea what you think. When someone questions your motives and says "You did that because you wanted to..." they are lying to you about you. They don't know why you do the things you do. When someone tries to re-create history and says "that never happened," (even though you know it did), they are trying to lie to you about you. When someone says you are stupid, lazy, worthless, etc. they are lying to you about you. When someone says you are going to fail or in some way tries to predict failure or defeat for your future, they are trying to lie to you about you.
You do not have to listen to someone lie to you about you. Other people may try to lie to you about you and that is extremely frustrating. However, please understand that often the lies that other people try to get you to believe about yourself often come from the devil. The Bible says that our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against powers and principalities. In other words, its not the other person that is your problem. The problem usually is related to the way in which the devil is trying to use the other person's words to hurt you, push your buttons, or to keep you from doing something that God has called you to do. The devil is the father of lies and the author of confusion. Recognize the true source of your problem. Its very easy to let other people push your buttons and to put up with things that a child of God does not deserve and does not have to put up with. Respectfully stand up for yourself as a child of God!
One night last year, my Mom and Dad had come over to my house around 10:30 or 11:00 pm to help me fix something. Normally, they would never be at my house at that time of night. While they were there, I received a phone call from some one that was upset with me and did not agree with a decision I had made. Unfortunately, rather than "agreeing to disagree" or calmly sharing with me why they did not agree with me, the person verbally attacked me. To use a good old Johnston county term, I basically got "cussed out". The person who called me did not know that I had other adults in my home at the time of night. They would never had said the things they did, had they realized that they were talking so loudly that everything they said could be heard through the phone by my mother who was in the room with me. I tried to defend my choices and explain the situation, but the person I was talking to would not listen to me. My mother kept saying, "Just hang up the phone. You don't have to listen to that." After the phone call ended, my mother talked to me and said,"Look, you do not have to hear that. It's a telephone call. You can always hang up. There's no reason to sit there and let someone talk to you like that. It's crazy to put up with that".
You know what? She was so right. It is ridiculous to let someone verbally abuse you on the telephone when all you have to do is hang up. You don't have to put up with someone accusing you, calling you names or using foul language towards you in any situation. It's even CRAZIER to put up with it on a telephone that can so easily be hung up. Why would you listen to someone lie to you about you? The same principle applies to any lies that the devil uses to try to attack your mind. You don't have to listen to it. Don't put up with it. Don't let him accuse you, call you names, threaten you, make you worry, live in fear, feel inferior or unworthy. He's already been defeated. The God that lives inside you is greater than the devil that roams the world looking to start trouble with you! When the devil tries to lie to you about you, you don't have to accept it. Renounce it as a lie. Say what the word of God says about you. The Bible says that we can resist Satan lies and refute them with the truth of the Word of God. "Submit to God, resist the devil, and he will flee from you!"
(Check out a book called The Complete Promise Bible for Women. Its organized by topic. You can actually look up a particular issue and it lists the specific scripture references that you can quote over your own self or situation. )
Never underestimate the power of quoting the Word of God over yourself and your situation. The truth about you is what GOD says about you. If someone calls you stupid, you renounce and refute that lie with the Word of God. Example :"I have the mind of Christ. My mind is being renewed".
Now, you may have people say things about you that are hurtful, but are not technically a lie. For example, if someone calls you fat because they are trying to hurt your feelings...and you know that you are truly fat...well, that's hurtful and mean, but its not a lie at the time. However, you work to make it a lie. You talk to God about it and start calling things that are not as though they were. You say to yourself and to God, "I am not fat. I am healthy. I am strong. My body is a temple of the Holy Spirit. I am getting healthier every day. I am losing weight. I will lose ___ pounds." Then go out there and start working towards your goal. (I used the example of being called fat because that's my own issue. Apply your own issues that you personally need to work to overcome!)
The devil will allow people to push your buttons in hopes that he can keep you sad, lonely, defeated, and depressed. John 10:10 says that the devil is a thief that has come to kill, steal, and destroy. For years, every time someone called me fat, cursed at me, called me names or in some way hurt my feelings, the first thing that I would do to try to comfort myself was to go get something to eat! How ridiculous is that! It only made me fatter. Do you see how the devil set me up to fail and to destroy my own self? I cannot blame another person for my choices. My weight was something that had to be dealt with between me and God and by refusing the devil and not allowing him to push my buttons. With God's help, I want to be in a position one day that if someone calls me fat, I can honestly say, "That's a lie!"
Recently, I let someone's words upset me and make me cry. Later that evening, I went to church. Shortly after I sat down, the minister said in his sermon, "Why are you letting the devil push your buttons? You are letting him control you. The devil is defeated...but he's not stupid. If he can control you by pushing your buttons, he will!" That was a word for me...I needed to hear that. Don't let lies, hurtful words, ugly names, or accusations push your buttons or control you. (Remember how I allowed being called fat to keep me fat? Crazy, isn't it?)
The devil may have come to kill, steal, and destroy....but the second part of that verse says that Jesus came that you might have life...an ABUNDANT life! Start claiming the life that you want to have today. You know what? You've got a lot to be thankful for and you have a lot going for you. Don't believe any more lies. Don't ever let anyone else ever lie to you about you. Did you know that you can even be guilty of lying to you about you? Anytime you tell yourself you are dumb, worthless or that you never do anything right, you are lying to you about you! Start saying the truth about you. You're smart, you're kind, you love your family, you work hard, you have talents, God loves you, you know how to do lots of things, you like to help people, you have friends, you love your kids, you like to look nice, you like to make people happy... SEE? You're AWESOME..and that's the truth!
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Are You Simply Exhausted?
This is a little F.Y.I. (for your information) tip that may also be considered T.M.I. (too much information)...but here goes... When your child is sick with a virus and is throwing up and you feel so bad for them...DO NOT ask them what flavor or color of gatorade they would like for you to purchase for them. Just buy the clear or yellow gatorade. Why? Because, if you ask them which kind they prefer, inevitably they will say "RED!" Guess what I have been doing this evening??? Getting recycled red Gatorade out of my carpets, bathroom rugs, walls, sheets, pillows, comforter, etc. Yes, that was indeed too much information. However, I felt it was my duty to warn you in case the virulent virus attacks your home and loved ones.
It has been over a month since my last blog post. How have you managed to survive the last month without such wise advice as the above mentioned Gatorade warning? Somehow you muddled through. Of course, I'm joking. With your busy life and responsibilities, I'm sure you have little time to be concerned with someone else's blog. With all that has been going on in my own life, I simply haven't had the time to work on my blog. Not quite a month ago, I had my 10 month old God-son placed in my home. He's been here ever since. Things have been quite busy ever since.
Since that time, I have developed some type of upper respiratory infection often referred to as "the crud". My children developed it as well. Fever, chills, sniffles, coughing, body aches...all the fun stuff. Now, the ubiquitous "stomach bug" has paid us a visit. Fun stuff!
We all have times in our lives that are less than glamorous and not exactly fun. Then there are those times in our lives when things take an even more serious turn and we face obstacles such as job loss, serious illness, injury, or the passing of a loved one. The Bible says that time and chance happen to us all. Christians and non-believers alike face their times of struggle or testing.
Whatever you are going through right now, know that you are not alone. You have a heavenly Father that will never leave you nor forsake you. He's always there. Maybe you are caring for a sick family member or you are responsible for the care of an aging parent. Perhaps you are concerned about finances, relationship issues, or your own health. All of these things can cause us to worry. Our worries can lead us down the road towards fear. Remember that God has not given you a spirit of fear, but power, love, and a sound mind!
Find some time to get alone to God and cry out to Him about your worries, concerns, and fears. Don't just find the time...MAKE the time. In the hectic pace of our daily lives, its just too easy to keep putting off our time alone with God. However, the busier you are and the more responsibilities that are placed upon your shoulders...the more important it is to find that time alone with God. Confide in a Christian friend and ask them to be a prayer partner for you during this difficult season of your life. The Bible tells us to bear one another's burdens. Two are better than one, because a Christian brother or sister can lift you up when you fall.
Also, remember to do something nice for yourself when you are in the middle of difficult times. You can't be the best mom, dad, wife, husband, employee, etc. that you can be if you are not taking care of yourself. When the safety instructions are given on an airplane, adults are told to put on their own oxygen mask first in an emergency, before they attempt to put it on their child or a disabled adult. In an airplane emergency, you have to get the oxygen that you need if you are going to be able to care for the child or sick person. The same principle applies when you are fulfilling your daily duties and responsibilities of life. You cannot provide the care that your children and family members need if you are not taking good care of yourself as well. Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit. You are God's workmanship. Take care of His good work!
Finally, don't forget to ask for help when you need it.. God does not expect you to be superman or superwoman. That's pride that makes you think that you can do it all by yourself! God knows that you need rest. God rested on the Sabbath and HE'S PERFECT! How have you been spending your Sabbath? Are you truly taking time to rest?
Have you ever been completely exhausted? Physically, emotionally, mentally exhausted. The cares of life can sometimes get us to that point. True and complete rest comes from God. Cast your cares upon Him, because He cares so much for you! Yes, that sounds like a Christian cliche...but it is scriptural. Give your worries to God and trust Him to handle it. Did He clean my carpets or bathroom walls? No. But He gave me the strength to keep going till I got it done. I'm giving thanks to God that the baby slept through the whole cleaning episode.
Today, enter into the rest that only comes from God. Cut the television or computer off a little early, and spend some time talking to and resting in God!
Matthew 11:28-30
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
It has been over a month since my last blog post. How have you managed to survive the last month without such wise advice as the above mentioned Gatorade warning? Somehow you muddled through. Of course, I'm joking. With your busy life and responsibilities, I'm sure you have little time to be concerned with someone else's blog. With all that has been going on in my own life, I simply haven't had the time to work on my blog. Not quite a month ago, I had my 10 month old God-son placed in my home. He's been here ever since. Things have been quite busy ever since.
Since that time, I have developed some type of upper respiratory infection often referred to as "the crud". My children developed it as well. Fever, chills, sniffles, coughing, body aches...all the fun stuff. Now, the ubiquitous "stomach bug" has paid us a visit. Fun stuff!
We all have times in our lives that are less than glamorous and not exactly fun. Then there are those times in our lives when things take an even more serious turn and we face obstacles such as job loss, serious illness, injury, or the passing of a loved one. The Bible says that time and chance happen to us all. Christians and non-believers alike face their times of struggle or testing.
Whatever you are going through right now, know that you are not alone. You have a heavenly Father that will never leave you nor forsake you. He's always there. Maybe you are caring for a sick family member or you are responsible for the care of an aging parent. Perhaps you are concerned about finances, relationship issues, or your own health. All of these things can cause us to worry. Our worries can lead us down the road towards fear. Remember that God has not given you a spirit of fear, but power, love, and a sound mind!
Find some time to get alone to God and cry out to Him about your worries, concerns, and fears. Don't just find the time...MAKE the time. In the hectic pace of our daily lives, its just too easy to keep putting off our time alone with God. However, the busier you are and the more responsibilities that are placed upon your shoulders...the more important it is to find that time alone with God. Confide in a Christian friend and ask them to be a prayer partner for you during this difficult season of your life. The Bible tells us to bear one another's burdens. Two are better than one, because a Christian brother or sister can lift you up when you fall.
Also, remember to do something nice for yourself when you are in the middle of difficult times. You can't be the best mom, dad, wife, husband, employee, etc. that you can be if you are not taking care of yourself. When the safety instructions are given on an airplane, adults are told to put on their own oxygen mask first in an emergency, before they attempt to put it on their child or a disabled adult. In an airplane emergency, you have to get the oxygen that you need if you are going to be able to care for the child or sick person. The same principle applies when you are fulfilling your daily duties and responsibilities of life. You cannot provide the care that your children and family members need if you are not taking good care of yourself as well. Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit. You are God's workmanship. Take care of His good work!
Finally, don't forget to ask for help when you need it.. God does not expect you to be superman or superwoman. That's pride that makes you think that you can do it all by yourself! God knows that you need rest. God rested on the Sabbath and HE'S PERFECT! How have you been spending your Sabbath? Are you truly taking time to rest?
Have you ever been completely exhausted? Physically, emotionally, mentally exhausted. The cares of life can sometimes get us to that point. True and complete rest comes from God. Cast your cares upon Him, because He cares so much for you! Yes, that sounds like a Christian cliche...but it is scriptural. Give your worries to God and trust Him to handle it. Did He clean my carpets or bathroom walls? No. But He gave me the strength to keep going till I got it done. I'm giving thanks to God that the baby slept through the whole cleaning episode.
Today, enter into the rest that only comes from God. Cut the television or computer off a little early, and spend some time talking to and resting in God!
Matthew 11:28-30
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Thursday, January 19, 2012
I've Got A Certified Man-Catcher!
Okay, guys. Valentine's day is fast approaching. DO NOT be one of those men scrounging around the left-over "slim pickings" on the Valentine's Day card aisle at Wal Mart on February 14. Go get your sweetie something good... NOW! And ladies...do not buy that man something that you would like on Valentine's Day. Do not embarrass that man with flowers at work. Get him something a man likes, please.
Write your sweetie a love letter before Valentine's Day. Don't wait until then to tell them how you feel. And by all means...if you have a Christian spouse or Christian boyfriend or girlfriend, then be thankful. I know she may not be as thin as she used to and he may not have as much hair as he used to. I'm sure that the two of you can think of plenty of little things that just drive each other crazy. However, having a Christian mate is a priceless treasure. Find a way today to thank your mate for being a Christian companion to you. Ladies, go out and buy the book "The Love Dare" that came from the movie Fireproof and start doing all the little love dares. Men, why don't you send your wife some flowers, today? I promise you that you will like the results!
Be sure to take time today to thank God for your Christian mate. Check out some of Stormie O'Martian's books such as "The Power of a Praying Wife" or "The Power of a Praying Husband" and get in the habit of praying specific scripture prayers for your spouse every day. When you pray specifically for your spouse each day, you will be surprised at how your feelings for that person will deepen, even if things are not so "rosy" between the two of you right now. Make time each day for you and your spouse to pray together. Be thankful that you have one another and that you both have Christ as the center of your relationship.
I got a random text message from a friend recently that said, "I just want a Christian man. Why is that so hard?" Honey, if I knew the answer to that one, I'd be a wealthy woman right now! Seems lately that all my single friends are looking a good Christian man and some of the married folks I know are looking a way out. I guess the grass is always greener on the other side. (Or at least the devil wants you to think that it is. I saw a facebook post a while back that said "The grass is greener over the septic tank, too!" ).
There is a store in Goldsboro that I like to visit on my lunch break. They sell purses, shoes, and lots of sparkly, shiny (perhaps, gaudy) costume jewelry...and I LOVE IT! The owner gets all excited when I come in. (Yes, I know why he gets all excited. Its not me he wants to see, its that green stuff in my wallet!) We like to tease and joke with one another. He's one of those salesmen that tell you how fabulous you look in everything you try on. I just laugh at him and tell him that he should be selling used cars. A few months ago, I visited the store and eyed a purple rhinestone ring. It was one of those large stretch rings that are popular now. The owner spotted me eyeing the rings. He said, "Oh, you need to get one of those. They're certified man-catchers." I joked right back and said,"In that case, I'll buy one for every finger!"
I settled for a large purple ring and a large, clear rhinestone one as well. After wearing one of the rings a few times, I decided that the store owner was actually correct! Those rings draw a lot of attention. Every time I wear one of them, I will get several comments through out the day. The rings may not be certified man-catchers but they are certainly attention-getters. If you place one of them on your left ring finger it does draw attention to the fact that you are not wearing a wedding ring. So...maybe he really did know what he was talking about!
Yesterday, I was sitting at a restaurant and an older couple sat at the table beside me. I was wearing the clear, rhinestone stretch ring. The gentleman said, "Wow, that's some ring you're wearing. I've never bought my wife one like that before. I bought her the ring she's wearing fifty-three years ago . I had to save up a long time to buy that ring. I've tried to buy her a better one a few times over the years, but she won't let me. She's still wearing that one. I went into the jewelry store to buy that ring fifty-three years ago and I got a parking ticket while I was in the store. I've still got the parking ticket at home". He just smiled to himself. I smiled back and said, "No, that ring she's wearing could never be replaced." I told them the funny story about the salesman calling my ring a man-catcher.The wife leaned over and looked at my ring. She said, "It is a pretty ring...just on someone else's finger".
Isn't that sweet? They were such a beautiful little couple. The wife admired my ring, but admitted that it wasn't for her. That's an example of a true love story. She was sticking with the one that she had. That's what a Christian relationship is all about. When I walked out to leave the restaurant, the gentleman smiled at me and said, "Good luck with that ring. I hope you find what you're looking for!"
Men and women were created with a longing to find a partner. God made us that way. When God made Adam, he said, "It is not good for man to be alone". God created Eve especially for Adam. Everyone has a longing to find that "someone special". When we do find our marriage partner, we are supposed to be together for a life-time commitment, like the sweet little couple above.
Whether you have found you lifetime partner or if you're still single and looking, its not easy. The single life can be hard and married life can be difficult, too. Well, here's my advice to all:
If you're single and on the dating scene, don't settle. Having been single for the last two years, I've learned that the single scene is rough these days and the whole dating game has changed. (People asking you out on Facebook, really??) Just stick to your standards.
If you are a Christian, you will be much happier alone than you will if you date a non-Christian. Now, I don't just mean just find someone that goes to church or someone that believes that God exists. I mean a true Bible-reading, praying, testifying, praising CHRISTIAN. Folks will say anything to get you to go out with them. Folks will visit church and pretend to be interested when they are still chasing you. You need someone who has a strong faith of their own, with or without you!
When someone asks me out, I don't even consider a dinner, a lunch or even a coffee until I know what their relationship is with Jesus Christ. Now, some folks may say, "What would it hurt to at least talk or go out for coffee? You could at least get a nice meal out of it." NOPE! I ask any man that wants to date me, "What is your relationship with Jesus Christ?" Some never make it past that question! Then, I ask, "What is God doing in your life right now?" That can be quite amusing, actually, because some folks have no idea how to answer that question. Single folks, I promise you that if someone can't answer that question they are not the right man or woman for you! Don't give up too soon. If you settle for dating Mr. or Mrs. Right Now, because you are bored and just want someone to hang out with, you may miss The Mrs. Right or The Mr. Right that GOD has for you!
If you're married, then stop looking! Nothing good will ever come of comparing your spouse to someone else. (You don't know what the other person is like behind closed doors any way!) If you and your spouse are both Christian, then thank God! Do whatever you can do to work through any issues that you have. If you're in a rough patch right now, do all that you can to work it out, even if you're the only one trying. Somebody has to make the first move. Let it be you! Get on your knees and start praying. Go to a Christian marriage counselor, even if you have to go by yourself. There are hundreds of books available by Christian authors and counselors on this subject. Dr. Gary Smalley, Dr. Gary Chapman, Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott and Dr. Emerson Eggerich have all written excellent books on the subject. There are many more books on the subject that can be found at a Christian bookstore or on Amazon.com.
If things are good in your relationship, then celebrate! Let your spouse know what a blessing they are to you. Praise them and start doing some acts of service or kindness that they are not expecting. Find ways to grow as a Christian couple.
If you are married and you are a Christian and your spouse it not...that's not easy. Don't nag. Just pray. Check out "Beloved Unbeliever" by Jo Berry or "How to Pray When He Doesn't Believe" by Maureen "Mo" Tizzard. Both books are excellent. Just keep praying. Don't ever give up on them!
Write your sweetie a love letter before Valentine's Day. Don't wait until then to tell them how you feel. And by all means...if you have a Christian spouse or Christian boyfriend or girlfriend, then be thankful. I know she may not be as thin as she used to and he may not have as much hair as he used to. I'm sure that the two of you can think of plenty of little things that just drive each other crazy. However, having a Christian mate is a priceless treasure. Find a way today to thank your mate for being a Christian companion to you. Ladies, go out and buy the book "The Love Dare" that came from the movie Fireproof and start doing all the little love dares. Men, why don't you send your wife some flowers, today? I promise you that you will like the results!
Be sure to take time today to thank God for your Christian mate. Check out some of Stormie O'Martian's books such as "The Power of a Praying Wife" or "The Power of a Praying Husband" and get in the habit of praying specific scripture prayers for your spouse every day. When you pray specifically for your spouse each day, you will be surprised at how your feelings for that person will deepen, even if things are not so "rosy" between the two of you right now. Make time each day for you and your spouse to pray together. Be thankful that you have one another and that you both have Christ as the center of your relationship.
I got a random text message from a friend recently that said, "I just want a Christian man. Why is that so hard?" Honey, if I knew the answer to that one, I'd be a wealthy woman right now! Seems lately that all my single friends are looking a good Christian man and some of the married folks I know are looking a way out. I guess the grass is always greener on the other side. (Or at least the devil wants you to think that it is. I saw a facebook post a while back that said "The grass is greener over the septic tank, too!" ).
There is a store in Goldsboro that I like to visit on my lunch break. They sell purses, shoes, and lots of sparkly, shiny (perhaps, gaudy) costume jewelry...and I LOVE IT! The owner gets all excited when I come in. (Yes, I know why he gets all excited. Its not me he wants to see, its that green stuff in my wallet!) We like to tease and joke with one another. He's one of those salesmen that tell you how fabulous you look in everything you try on. I just laugh at him and tell him that he should be selling used cars. A few months ago, I visited the store and eyed a purple rhinestone ring. It was one of those large stretch rings that are popular now. The owner spotted me eyeing the rings. He said, "Oh, you need to get one of those. They're certified man-catchers." I joked right back and said,"In that case, I'll buy one for every finger!"
I settled for a large purple ring and a large, clear rhinestone one as well. After wearing one of the rings a few times, I decided that the store owner was actually correct! Those rings draw a lot of attention. Every time I wear one of them, I will get several comments through out the day. The rings may not be certified man-catchers but they are certainly attention-getters. If you place one of them on your left ring finger it does draw attention to the fact that you are not wearing a wedding ring. So...maybe he really did know what he was talking about!
Yesterday, I was sitting at a restaurant and an older couple sat at the table beside me. I was wearing the clear, rhinestone stretch ring. The gentleman said, "Wow, that's some ring you're wearing. I've never bought my wife one like that before. I bought her the ring she's wearing fifty-three years ago . I had to save up a long time to buy that ring. I've tried to buy her a better one a few times over the years, but she won't let me. She's still wearing that one. I went into the jewelry store to buy that ring fifty-three years ago and I got a parking ticket while I was in the store. I've still got the parking ticket at home". He just smiled to himself. I smiled back and said, "No, that ring she's wearing could never be replaced." I told them the funny story about the salesman calling my ring a man-catcher.The wife leaned over and looked at my ring. She said, "It is a pretty ring...just on someone else's finger".
Isn't that sweet? They were such a beautiful little couple. The wife admired my ring, but admitted that it wasn't for her. That's an example of a true love story. She was sticking with the one that she had. That's what a Christian relationship is all about. When I walked out to leave the restaurant, the gentleman smiled at me and said, "Good luck with that ring. I hope you find what you're looking for!"
Men and women were created with a longing to find a partner. God made us that way. When God made Adam, he said, "It is not good for man to be alone". God created Eve especially for Adam. Everyone has a longing to find that "someone special". When we do find our marriage partner, we are supposed to be together for a life-time commitment, like the sweet little couple above.
Matthew 19:4-6
He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’. So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
Whether you have found you lifetime partner or if you're still single and looking, its not easy. The single life can be hard and married life can be difficult, too. Well, here's my advice to all:
If you're single and on the dating scene, don't settle. Having been single for the last two years, I've learned that the single scene is rough these days and the whole dating game has changed. (People asking you out on Facebook, really??) Just stick to your standards.
If you are a Christian, you will be much happier alone than you will if you date a non-Christian. Now, I don't just mean just find someone that goes to church or someone that believes that God exists. I mean a true Bible-reading, praying, testifying, praising CHRISTIAN. Folks will say anything to get you to go out with them. Folks will visit church and pretend to be interested when they are still chasing you. You need someone who has a strong faith of their own, with or without you!
When someone asks me out, I don't even consider a dinner, a lunch or even a coffee until I know what their relationship is with Jesus Christ. Now, some folks may say, "What would it hurt to at least talk or go out for coffee? You could at least get a nice meal out of it." NOPE! I ask any man that wants to date me, "What is your relationship with Jesus Christ?" Some never make it past that question! Then, I ask, "What is God doing in your life right now?" That can be quite amusing, actually, because some folks have no idea how to answer that question. Single folks, I promise you that if someone can't answer that question they are not the right man or woman for you! Don't give up too soon. If you settle for dating Mr. or Mrs. Right Now, because you are bored and just want someone to hang out with, you may miss The Mrs. Right or The Mr. Right that GOD has for you!
If you're married, then stop looking! Nothing good will ever come of comparing your spouse to someone else. (You don't know what the other person is like behind closed doors any way!) If you and your spouse are both Christian, then thank God! Do whatever you can do to work through any issues that you have. If you're in a rough patch right now, do all that you can to work it out, even if you're the only one trying. Somebody has to make the first move. Let it be you! Get on your knees and start praying. Go to a Christian marriage counselor, even if you have to go by yourself. There are hundreds of books available by Christian authors and counselors on this subject. Dr. Gary Smalley, Dr. Gary Chapman, Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott and Dr. Emerson Eggerich have all written excellent books on the subject. There are many more books on the subject that can be found at a Christian bookstore or on Amazon.com.
If things are good in your relationship, then celebrate! Let your spouse know what a blessing they are to you. Praise them and start doing some acts of service or kindness that they are not expecting. Find ways to grow as a Christian couple.
Proverbs 5:18 May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.
If you are married and you are a Christian and your spouse it not...that's not easy. Don't nag. Just pray. Check out "Beloved Unbeliever" by Jo Berry or "How to Pray When He Doesn't Believe" by Maureen "Mo" Tizzard. Both books are excellent. Just keep praying. Don't ever give up on them!
1 Corinthians 7:13-14
And if a Christian woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to continue living with her, she must not leave him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
The same scripture above applies to Christian men who are married to unbelieving wives. Don't ever give up. Keep praying and believing for their salvation. Be persistent, regardless of how things look. The Bible says that the effectual, fervent prayer of the righteous availeth much! That means there's power in your persistent prayers! Just remember that you are not fighting against "flesh and blood" (your spouse), you are struggling with the spiritual forces of darkness that are in the world as a result of Satan. Your spouse is not the enemy, though it may feel like it at times. It's not that they don't love you, even though they may say or do hurtful things. I guarantee you that they really do love you. The problem is that what is inside of them hates the God that is inside of you. Try not to take it personally. Are they nice to everybody but you? You've probably got a spiritual warfare issue on your hands. This problem will be solved on your knees in prayer. Find a strong Christian friend that can pray and agree with you and be a sounding board. (Make sure that it is a same sex friend. It is not a good idea to have this person be a member of the opposite sex). Just keep praying!
Be thankful for the mate that God has blessed you with and show them some appreciation today for their good qualities! Pray for your partner today. If you're single, then start praying now for that Christian cutie that God is going to bless you with!
Be thankful for the mate that God has blessed you with and show them some appreciation today for their good qualities! Pray for your partner today. If you're single, then start praying now for that Christian cutie that God is going to bless you with!
Monday, January 16, 2012
Sno Cone or Snow Cream..Its all a Matter of Preferences
Sno Cone or Snow Cream?
So, how do you like this colder weather we are having? I see on Facebook each day that some folks are praying for summer and warmer weather to hurry up and arrive, while other folks are praying for snow. It's all a matter of personal preferences. It's all good to me. I can have some snow cream in winter and a sno-cone in summer. I like 'em both!
(As a side note, I don't understand Southerners and our love for snow cream. We would NEVER drink rain water, right? But we will scrape some snow off the top of our car and mix it with some Eagle Brand milk and vanilla flavoring and call it a treat! It's pretty gross when you think about it. It's the SAME THING as drinking rain water. But I'm not going to lie. If it snowed today, I would eat some!)
I'm sure you and your friends and family love to get sno-cones on a hot summer day. I love to visit the famous "Hills of Snow" sno-cone place in Smithfield. When I'm there, I don't get grape or cherry. I can get that anywhere. I can make some grape or cherry Kool-aid at the house. When I go to Hills of Snow, I want to get the wild and crazy flavors. My personal favorite is to get "Mai Tai" flavor on one side and "Tiger Blood" flavor on the other side of the sno-cone.
(That Tiger Blood flavor is slamming! You need to check it out! I also recommend getting Wedding Cake on one side and Birthday Cake on the other side. Another good choice is getting Green apple or Sour apple on one side and then Red Candy Apple on the other. The flavors compliment one another well. What can I say? I'm a sno-cone connoisseur).
Now, when some folks go to get a sno-cone, they get either grape or cherry, because they like to stick with what they know. They don't like to venture out of their comfort zone. They figure if they try a new flavor, they might not like it, and they would rather get a flavor that they know they like. When some folks go to Baskin Robbins, they get either chocolate or vanilla. Not me, I want to try the newest, craziest flavor that they have. There's nothing wrong with being either way. It's a matter of preferences. When my youngest son was two, my sister was his daycare provider. She took him to the "Hills of Snow" place one day to get a sno-cone. She asked him if he wanted a purple or a red sno-cone. Since he was two, she figured he could understand "purple or red" rather than getting into all the different flavors. He said "Umm, I'll have a tiga blood, please". That's my boy! She just laughed and said to the cashier "Okay, I think he's been here before!"
Everyone has their little preferences and ways of doing things. There have been studies done on the percentages of people that like the toilet paper roll to roll from the top down or to roll from the underside. I saw on Dr. Phil recently that a husband and wife had major arguments about which way the total paper should roll. So the Dr. Phil show producers contacted some group of people like the Toilet Paper Manufacturers of America or something like that (I don't remember the exact name). Anyway, the toilet paper experts said that there really is no wrong or right way for the toilet paper to roll from the dispenser. Its all a matter of preferences.
(Well, thanks for clearing that up. Might have stayed up all night wondering about that one.)
Many of the petty arguments that spouses, siblings, co-workers, neighbors, and roommates get embroiled in are often just a matter of preferences. Often, no one is truly right or wrong. Each side has their own opinion about the best way to handle the situation. Honestly, both sides probably have the best intentions and truly believe that things would go more smoothly if the other side shared their opinions.Sadly, a lot of the arguments that Christians get entangled with in their own churches are really just a matter of preference as well. Matters such as style of music, style of worship, sermon delivery style, leadership styles, and ways to administer programs within the church are all just a matter of preference. Your particular preference for a style of Christian music over another does not mean that your preference is more holy or sacred than someone else's. God made us different with our own set of likes and dislikes.
There are some matters that are not about preference. Jesus was the son of God. He died on the cross to save us from our sins. He rose again. He is The Way, The Truth, and The Life. That is a non-negotiable. He is the only way to Heaven. There are some things that are certain and are not up to individual preferences. Take the Ten Commandments, for instance. They are written in stone. (Get it? Written in stone. Ha! I crack myself up!) Seriously, there are parts of our faith life that are certain. God is the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. The Bible is the inspired word of God. Everything in the Bible is true. Jesus was perfect and sinless. The only way to Heaven is to accept Jesus Christ. God loves everyone. Those are all non-negotiables.
However, there are certain parts of our church work and the way that we organize our churches that are a matter of preference. If you have struggled with another person's style of worship, style of Christian music, preaching style, or organizational style, or the way in which they use their gifts, stop and ask yourself, "Is this just a matter of preference?"
I was in a Bible book store recently and heard a woman LOUDLY complaining to another customer about everything that was wrong with her church. For several minutes she went on. "Well, I just told the Pastor so and so" and "that is not worship, I know what real worship is" and on and on she went criticizing the Pastor and the worship and all sorts of things about the church. I so wanted to walk up to her and say "I bet you've won a lot of people to Jesus this year!" However, since I just wrote a blog about minding your own business and keeping your opinions to yourself, I decided to keep my mouth shut! She was so loud and so mean- spirited in her comments, I purposely walked up to the front of the store so I didn't have to hear her any more. If her Pastor really needs that much help, maybe she should be at home praying for Him instead of throwing him under the bus at the Christian bookstore? I'm just saying!
If you have recently had a difference of opinion with someone in your life, ask yourself, "Is this just a matter of preference?" Seek to understand their point of view. Maybe you can agree to disagree!
Romans 12: 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Hebrews 12:14 Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord.
Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.
So, how do you like this colder weather we are having? I see on Facebook each day that some folks are praying for summer and warmer weather to hurry up and arrive, while other folks are praying for snow. It's all a matter of personal preferences. It's all good to me. I can have some snow cream in winter and a sno-cone in summer. I like 'em both!
(As a side note, I don't understand Southerners and our love for snow cream. We would NEVER drink rain water, right? But we will scrape some snow off the top of our car and mix it with some Eagle Brand milk and vanilla flavoring and call it a treat! It's pretty gross when you think about it. It's the SAME THING as drinking rain water. But I'm not going to lie. If it snowed today, I would eat some!)
I'm sure you and your friends and family love to get sno-cones on a hot summer day. I love to visit the famous "Hills of Snow" sno-cone place in Smithfield. When I'm there, I don't get grape or cherry. I can get that anywhere. I can make some grape or cherry Kool-aid at the house. When I go to Hills of Snow, I want to get the wild and crazy flavors. My personal favorite is to get "Mai Tai" flavor on one side and "Tiger Blood" flavor on the other side of the sno-cone.
(That Tiger Blood flavor is slamming! You need to check it out! I also recommend getting Wedding Cake on one side and Birthday Cake on the other side. Another good choice is getting Green apple or Sour apple on one side and then Red Candy Apple on the other. The flavors compliment one another well. What can I say? I'm a sno-cone connoisseur).
Now, when some folks go to get a sno-cone, they get either grape or cherry, because they like to stick with what they know. They don't like to venture out of their comfort zone. They figure if they try a new flavor, they might not like it, and they would rather get a flavor that they know they like. When some folks go to Baskin Robbins, they get either chocolate or vanilla. Not me, I want to try the newest, craziest flavor that they have. There's nothing wrong with being either way. It's a matter of preferences. When my youngest son was two, my sister was his daycare provider. She took him to the "Hills of Snow" place one day to get a sno-cone. She asked him if he wanted a purple or a red sno-cone. Since he was two, she figured he could understand "purple or red" rather than getting into all the different flavors. He said "Umm, I'll have a tiga blood, please". That's my boy! She just laughed and said to the cashier "Okay, I think he's been here before!"
Everyone has their little preferences and ways of doing things. There have been studies done on the percentages of people that like the toilet paper roll to roll from the top down or to roll from the underside. I saw on Dr. Phil recently that a husband and wife had major arguments about which way the total paper should roll. So the Dr. Phil show producers contacted some group of people like the Toilet Paper Manufacturers of America or something like that (I don't remember the exact name). Anyway, the toilet paper experts said that there really is no wrong or right way for the toilet paper to roll from the dispenser. Its all a matter of preferences.
(Well, thanks for clearing that up. Might have stayed up all night wondering about that one.)
Many of the petty arguments that spouses, siblings, co-workers, neighbors, and roommates get embroiled in are often just a matter of preferences. Often, no one is truly right or wrong. Each side has their own opinion about the best way to handle the situation. Honestly, both sides probably have the best intentions and truly believe that things would go more smoothly if the other side shared their opinions.Sadly, a lot of the arguments that Christians get entangled with in their own churches are really just a matter of preference as well. Matters such as style of music, style of worship, sermon delivery style, leadership styles, and ways to administer programs within the church are all just a matter of preference. Your particular preference for a style of Christian music over another does not mean that your preference is more holy or sacred than someone else's. God made us different with our own set of likes and dislikes.
There are some matters that are not about preference. Jesus was the son of God. He died on the cross to save us from our sins. He rose again. He is The Way, The Truth, and The Life. That is a non-negotiable. He is the only way to Heaven. There are some things that are certain and are not up to individual preferences. Take the Ten Commandments, for instance. They are written in stone. (Get it? Written in stone. Ha! I crack myself up!) Seriously, there are parts of our faith life that are certain. God is the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. The Bible is the inspired word of God. Everything in the Bible is true. Jesus was perfect and sinless. The only way to Heaven is to accept Jesus Christ. God loves everyone. Those are all non-negotiables.
However, there are certain parts of our church work and the way that we organize our churches that are a matter of preference. If you have struggled with another person's style of worship, style of Christian music, preaching style, or organizational style, or the way in which they use their gifts, stop and ask yourself, "Is this just a matter of preference?"
I was in a Bible book store recently and heard a woman LOUDLY complaining to another customer about everything that was wrong with her church. For several minutes she went on. "Well, I just told the Pastor so and so" and "that is not worship, I know what real worship is" and on and on she went criticizing the Pastor and the worship and all sorts of things about the church. I so wanted to walk up to her and say "I bet you've won a lot of people to Jesus this year!" However, since I just wrote a blog about minding your own business and keeping your opinions to yourself, I decided to keep my mouth shut! She was so loud and so mean- spirited in her comments, I purposely walked up to the front of the store so I didn't have to hear her any more. If her Pastor really needs that much help, maybe she should be at home praying for Him instead of throwing him under the bus at the Christian bookstore? I'm just saying!
If you have recently had a difference of opinion with someone in your life, ask yourself, "Is this just a matter of preference?" Seek to understand their point of view. Maybe you can agree to disagree!
Romans 12: 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Hebrews 12:14 Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord.
Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Finally...something you can stir up besides trouble!
In my previous blog, I discussed that God hates it when people stir up trouble among Christians. The phrase "Stirring something up" is generally considered a bad thing and has a negative connotation, such as "stirring up trouble". Stirring up trouble is certainly something that should be avoided. However, there is one thing that the Bible does tell us that we are supposed to stir up. We are supposed to stir up the spiritual gifts that God has given us.
Do you know what your spiritual gift is? Are you using your spiritual gifts? If not, stir up the gift that is inside you. It was given to you by God. Use it! Do not be afraid. God did not give you a spirit of fear. He gave you power, love and a strong mind!
Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms. 1 Pet. 4:10
Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. Romans 12:4-6a
Spiritual gifts include: Prophecy, Leadership, Administration, Healing, Apostle, Service, Teaching, Exhortation, Giving, Mercy, Evangelism, Pastoring, Intercessory prayer, Hospitality, Wisdom, Faith ,etc. (Different theologians break down this list and translate it in different ways. Not trying to get into a deep discussion on that. Just want you to understand an example of spiritual gifts)
In addition to the spiritual gifts mentioned in the Bible, each of us also have individual natural talents such as drawing, singing, carpentry, cooking, athleticism. Those talents are usually present at a very early age. When my daughter was in second grade, I was called in for a conference with her teacher, Mrs. Rosemary Gatewood. She said, "Let me show you her Math notebook". I flipped through the pages of the Math notebook. I found many beautiful drawings. There were pictures of unicorns, princesses, girls performing gymnastics, lots of drawings of girls in bathing suits at the beach, kittens, puppies, mermaids...beautiful artwork...but, alas, no math. So...apparently, she's not going to be a mathematician. That's okay. We have chosen to develop the talents that she has by enrolling her in drama camp, buying drums and getting her drum lessons, purchasing art supplies, buying a saxophone and supporting the local band. Mrs. Gatewood was very understanding of Chelsea's creativity and "busyness" and worked very hard to find ways to keep Chelsea focused on her work that year, while still understanding her personality and strengths.
Many of us think that God cannot use us because of anything that we perceive as a weakness or that we have allowed others to convince us is a flaw in our personality.Every single person on earth has some kind of bad habit or character flaw.Every person on earth also has some kind of gift that they can share or something special about them that God can use. I have said in a previous blog..."God can use you in spite of your weaknesses. God may often choose to use you because of your weaknesses." You may need to work on your "areas for improvement" and ask God to hep you change, but that does not mean that you are disqualified from his service.
Start thinking about your natural talents, your personality, and your spiritual gifts and how they work together. I think my oldest son has the spiritual gift of evangelism. The story of Jesus' death on the cross was always his favorite Bible story. He wanted to read that one every night when we read Bible stories at bed-time. When he was around four years old, he got a Easter story book in addition to his Easter basket and gifts from the "Easter Bunny". The whole book was about the Easter story.When he went to church on that Easter Sunday morning, he couldn't wait to show everyone his book. He was walking up to older people that had probably been Christians for seventy years and saying, "Do you know Jesus? Are you saved?" and trying to show them his book.
His personality and his individual strengths fit very well with his spiritual gift of evangelism. That boy can talk to anybody about anything. Doesn't know a stranger. When he was very little, he walked up to a stranger at Bojangles and invited him to his birthday party that afternoon. He is a very welcoming and accepting person and likes to talk to people, which is exactly the kind of personality and strengths you need if you have the gift of evangelism.
Sometimes our gifts and personality can get us into interesting situations. When my oldest son that I mentioned above, was about four and playing t-ball, he really liked his t-ball coach, Mr. Chris. One night he yelled out while on the baseball field. "Hey, Mr. Chris, why don't you come to my house tonight. My daddy's not going to be home!" Oh my goodness, I was so embarrassed. What he meant was that his Dad was working out of town at that time. He probably thought it would be fun to play baseball in the yard with Mr. Chris, since his Dad would be working and not able to play with him that night. It was actually a compliment to his Dad and to Mr. Chris as well. But that is not how it sounded. He made it sound like men came over to the house all the time when his Daddy wasn't home! It's funny now..but I was sooo embarrassed at the time!
I told that funny story to make a point. We have to remember that the characteristics of other people that might get on our nerves or embarrass us are just the very thing that God may use for ministry. Everyone is not going to be like you or have the same interests, giftings, or style of ministry. God chooses to use all of us, with our imperfections, to fulfill His purposes on earth. Don't question why or how God is using someone else. Focus on how He can use YOU!
“Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit. And there are varieties of ministries, but the same Lord. And there are varieties of effects, but the same God who works all things in all persons” (1 Corinthians 12:4-6).
If you are tempted to question how God is using someone's gift or giftings...don't. Work on stirring up your own gift. Don't be afraid. God has not given you a spirit of fear. He has given you power, love, and a strong mind! Stir up your gifts!
In II Timothy 1:6-13, Paul wrote to Timothy. He told Timothy, a young preacher, to "stir up the gift of God" that was inside him. He reminded Timothy that God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.
In essence, Paul was saying, to Timothy... "You have been saved, you have the Holy Spirit dwelling in you. Timothy, God has called you into His service. I place my hands upon you as a token of God�s call. Timothy, do not be afraid. God has given you everything you need. Stir yourself up and do what God asks of you."
Do you know what your spiritual gift is? Are you using your spiritual gifts? If not, stir up the gift that is inside you. It was given to you by God. Use it! Do not be afraid. God did not give you a spirit of fear. He gave you power, love and a strong mind!
Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms. 1 Pet. 4:10
Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. Romans 12:4-6a
Spiritual gifts include: Prophecy, Leadership, Administration, Healing, Apostle, Service, Teaching, Exhortation, Giving, Mercy, Evangelism, Pastoring, Intercessory prayer, Hospitality, Wisdom, Faith ,etc. (Different theologians break down this list and translate it in different ways. Not trying to get into a deep discussion on that. Just want you to understand an example of spiritual gifts)
In addition to the spiritual gifts mentioned in the Bible, each of us also have individual natural talents such as drawing, singing, carpentry, cooking, athleticism. Those talents are usually present at a very early age. When my daughter was in second grade, I was called in for a conference with her teacher, Mrs. Rosemary Gatewood. She said, "Let me show you her Math notebook". I flipped through the pages of the Math notebook. I found many beautiful drawings. There were pictures of unicorns, princesses, girls performing gymnastics, lots of drawings of girls in bathing suits at the beach, kittens, puppies, mermaids...beautiful artwork...but, alas, no math. So...apparently, she's not going to be a mathematician. That's okay. We have chosen to develop the talents that she has by enrolling her in drama camp, buying drums and getting her drum lessons, purchasing art supplies, buying a saxophone and supporting the local band. Mrs. Gatewood was very understanding of Chelsea's creativity and "busyness" and worked very hard to find ways to keep Chelsea focused on her work that year, while still understanding her personality and strengths.
Many of us think that God cannot use us because of anything that we perceive as a weakness or that we have allowed others to convince us is a flaw in our personality.Every single person on earth has some kind of bad habit or character flaw.Every person on earth also has some kind of gift that they can share or something special about them that God can use. I have said in a previous blog..."God can use you in spite of your weaknesses. God may often choose to use you because of your weaknesses." You may need to work on your "areas for improvement" and ask God to hep you change, but that does not mean that you are disqualified from his service.
Start thinking about your natural talents, your personality, and your spiritual gifts and how they work together. I think my oldest son has the spiritual gift of evangelism. The story of Jesus' death on the cross was always his favorite Bible story. He wanted to read that one every night when we read Bible stories at bed-time. When he was around four years old, he got a Easter story book in addition to his Easter basket and gifts from the "Easter Bunny". The whole book was about the Easter story.When he went to church on that Easter Sunday morning, he couldn't wait to show everyone his book. He was walking up to older people that had probably been Christians for seventy years and saying, "Do you know Jesus? Are you saved?" and trying to show them his book.
His personality and his individual strengths fit very well with his spiritual gift of evangelism. That boy can talk to anybody about anything. Doesn't know a stranger. When he was very little, he walked up to a stranger at Bojangles and invited him to his birthday party that afternoon. He is a very welcoming and accepting person and likes to talk to people, which is exactly the kind of personality and strengths you need if you have the gift of evangelism.
Sometimes our gifts and personality can get us into interesting situations. When my oldest son that I mentioned above, was about four and playing t-ball, he really liked his t-ball coach, Mr. Chris. One night he yelled out while on the baseball field. "Hey, Mr. Chris, why don't you come to my house tonight. My daddy's not going to be home!" Oh my goodness, I was so embarrassed. What he meant was that his Dad was working out of town at that time. He probably thought it would be fun to play baseball in the yard with Mr. Chris, since his Dad would be working and not able to play with him that night. It was actually a compliment to his Dad and to Mr. Chris as well. But that is not how it sounded. He made it sound like men came over to the house all the time when his Daddy wasn't home! It's funny now..but I was sooo embarrassed at the time!
I told that funny story to make a point. We have to remember that the characteristics of other people that might get on our nerves or embarrass us are just the very thing that God may use for ministry. Everyone is not going to be like you or have the same interests, giftings, or style of ministry. God chooses to use all of us, with our imperfections, to fulfill His purposes on earth. Don't question why or how God is using someone else. Focus on how He can use YOU!
“Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit. And there are varieties of ministries, but the same Lord. And there are varieties of effects, but the same God who works all things in all persons” (1 Corinthians 12:4-6).
If you are tempted to question how God is using someone's gift or giftings...don't. Work on stirring up your own gift. Don't be afraid. God has not given you a spirit of fear. He has given you power, love, and a strong mind! Stir up your gifts!
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